There is a rawness that to this series that I have not seen in my work before. I like it. I am intrigued by it. I am raw. After two months in China my heart opened me in a way I have not been open before. And every heart opening has its own vulnerability and risk. I see that in the work. While in China during May and June of 2018 I was taken hostage by the concept of the life’s paradoxes. I couldn’t talk about it, nor write about it, or make art about it.
Upon returning home, I immersed myself in my studio and emptied my heart, my soul, and my thoughts onto the paper, without a clear idea of what I needed to say. I set to work, soaking crumpling, tearing, wounding, sculpting The process itself, is a paradox – The forms emerged slowly, gradually, guiding me where they needed to go, what needed to be said. At times it was spontaneous and fast, followed by moments of slow and precise.
The paper is thick. With many layers it is soaked over time, crumpled and weighed down, shaped and molded, dried, pierced, torn, sewn, marked. It endures many processes and is strong enough to withstand them. The paper became a metaphor for me. I am strong, I withstand. I am transformed through my experiences, becoming deeper and with more meaning. Through the wounds I am whole.
Generally, I spend as much time needed to draft the text prior to hand printing it onto the paper. However in this series I allowed the words to flow freely, directly onto the surface of the sculpted paper. Some of the writing is obscured through the process of making the piece:
The Paradox of being human is complex…in curiosity. Every inhale is followed by an exhale. Every expansion is followed by a time of contraction. Every happiness is followed by sorrow. A grief. Every success is accompanied by failure or a series of failures that preceded or will follow. The Paradox of being human is that we have choice and yet our path has been predetermined. The paradox is that good and bad exist in all of us – both are cultivated by our experiences.
The paradox of being human is the longing to love and be loved and the fear of expressing love to ourselves or another.
The paradox of being human is that we are forever looking forward or looking past, overlooking the present and perfect now.
The paradox of being human is our need to be generous, our need to be needed, and our inability to receive.
Is that we are all flawed. We are all imperfect. Yet we strive for that which is elusive at best and impossible at most. Perfection. We may stumble on moments of perfection, but they are rare and often precious. But embracing the flaws proved different tangible forms of perfection which is more satisfying and attainable because it allows for the perfect within the flaws.