There is a rawness that to this series that I have not seen in my work before. I like it. I am intrigued by it. I am raw. After two months in China my heart opened me in a way I have not been open before. And every heart opening has its own vulnerability and risk. I see that in the work. While in China during May and June of 2018 I was taken hostage by the concept of the life’s paradoxes. I couldn’t talk about it, nor write about it, or make art about it.
Upon returning home, I immersed myself in my studio and emptied my heart, my soul, and my thoughts onto the paper, without a clear idea of what I needed to say. I set to work, soaking crumpling, tearing, wounding, sculpting The process itself, is a paradox – The forms emerged slowly, gradually, guiding me where they needed to go, what needed to be said. At times it was spontaneous and fast, followed by moments of slow and precise.
The paper is thick. With many layers it is soaked over time, crumpled and weighed down, shaped and molded, dried, pierced, torn, sewn, marked. It endures many processes and is strong enough to withstand them. The paper became a metaphor for me. I am strong, I withstand. I am transformed through my experiences, becoming deeper and with more meaning. Through the wounds I am whole.
Generally, I spend as much time needed to draft the text prior to hand printing it onto the paper. However in this series I allowed the words to flow freely, directly onto the surface of the sculpted paper. Some of the writing is obscured through the process of making the piece:
The Paradox of Being Human is…
…loving should be easy but we complicate it
Worry and wonder….
…we worry that things will go wrong, that we are not enough, or how to resolve a problem. Imagine if we wondered how things might turn out, wondered how people will respond, wonder will lead you to what you might find
…is the ability to forgive others yet hold ourselves in atonement
…choosing silence over truth
…is the desire to fit in and the need to be your unique and beautiful self.
…is that we forget. We forget because we are in our own head and lose our empathy
…is that our breath can relax the whole body and mind …and during times of stress we hold our breath.
…is that we so often don’t say what we mean and what we do say causes pain to both people.
…is having the ability to love another with all your heart and having complete disdain for yourself.
…is the challenge of being yourself fully and completely without judgment, shame, pride or remorse and standing in your own beautiful light.
…is we make time for constructive purpose and use them destructively